Tackling School Stress
By: Maulik k.
Trivedi, MD
Stress is an
unavoidable fact of life. We all experience stress in some form
everyday. Let’s face it, the kids feel it, the parents feel it,
and so does their school staff.
Stress for the
student in your family usually begins early in the morning with
trying to wake-up on time and getting ready for school. It
continues during the school day and also after school with
homework, studying for exams, and completing projects. And we
haven’t even mentioned little league, gymnastics, or the soccer
game. As if this wasn’t enough, there are worries at night about
the bully at school or the new pimple sprouting on the forehead.
Daily
struggles with such stress can quickly overwhelm the student to
the point of jeopardizing academic progress. Sometimes, it can
stigmatize the learning process for a child during the formative
age when they need to use it the most.
Luckily, there
are ways of effectively dealing with such stresses and avoiding
their undesirable outcomes. Here are five sure-fire tips to help
tackle the stresses in YOUR student’s life.
PLAN AHEAD:
It’s always best to avoid stress.
Remember, one
of the keys to success is timely and thorough preparation.
Knowing what is expected and having spent time preparing for it
really improves the odds of coming out a winner. Having a plan
really helps take a big bite out of stress – even before you
start!
First, prepare
an overview of the school year on a calendar. Mark off important
dates such as major exams, report-cards and parent teacher
meetings. Include fun days like holidays, vacations and school
trips to motivate the child. As you fill out this academic
calendar, also weave in exciting activities right before and after
stressful periods. These can include weekend camping trips, family
visits, going to sports events or even spending time on hobbies.
This is important for boosting your child’s inner capacity to deal
with stress.
Preparing such
a calendar will allow for timely and thorough preparations that
will go a long way in eliminating stress before it happens.
DON’T PANIC IN
STRESSFUL SITUATIONS: Simplify the problem and solve it piece
by piece.
Experience
breeds confidence. Having limited experience at problem solving, a
child can easily feel frustrated and overwhelmed in a challenging
situation. You can help the child evaluate the problem in its
proper perspective by breaking it down into smaller more
achievable goals. Allowing your child to contribute to this
process by suggesting solutions will help him or her feel
empowered and teach the child this valuable skill for the future.
This exercise helps pave the way to success by nurturing a child’s
developing self-confidence. Be sure to allow enough time and
provide adequate support to help your child conquer the problem.
If the child
is stressed, don’t magnify the problem by letting out your
frustrations and anger inappropriately. Get input from people who
know your child well. Talk to others who may have encountered
similar difficulties, research the issue on the internet or read a
book about it.
LISTEN TO THE
CHILD: Being heard eliminates a lot of stress.
‘Talking it
out’ is the oldest antidote to stress. We vent to our friends and
family almost everyday. There is a tremendous diffusion of mental
tension in ‘just’ venting. And if there’s someone to offer a
supportive comment in response, we really feel better. That
feeling of empathy can often fuel the motivational drive to propel
us in the direction of success.
Children see
themselves as incapable and weak in comparison to the adults.
(though, your teenager may never admit this to you). Often times,
just having an adult say “tell me more” or “I felt that way when I
was your age” can help the child establish a sense of stability in
difficult circumstances. Even a few simple well timed “uh-huh”s
can lead the situation away from frustration and stress. By
having their stressful feelings validated by an adult, children
find a great sense of comfort. They feel supported in their
endeavors and consequently improve their odds at succeeding.
RECOGNIZE THE
SIGNS OF STRESS: When stress is evident promptly address the
issue.
Some of the
most common signs observed in stressed children and adolescents
are irritability, aloofness, appearing preoccupied, doing things
without thinking of the outcome, repeatedly complaining about body
aches and pains, having changes in sleeping or eating habits,
having nightmares, resurgence of bed-wetting, and having sudden
decline in grades or avoiding going to school altogether.
If you
recognize any such signs of stress in your child, seek input from
the school-teacher, guidance counselor, school psychologist, or
the clergy. The pediatrician may be helpful in arranging a
professional consultation with a mental health professional.
Some of the
signs of stress are indicative of deeper emotional problems that
often require medical treatment. If the signs are persistent and
severe enough to limit a child from functioning at an age-expected
level, then it is advisable to seek a psychiatric evaluation and
investigate treatment options as soon a possible.
The most
common of such treatable conditions in elementary school children
are separation anxiety, behavioral problems, and often the most
elusive, depression. In older children and adolescents, signs of
overt stress may be indicative of underlying depression, anxiety,
or possible substance abuse. These medical conditions often run
in families. Therefore, someone else in the family having
suffered one of these mental conditions makes it more likely that
a child may be suffering early symptoms of the same.
And Lastly,
EAT RIGHT,
DRINK PLENTY OF WATER, SLEEP WELL, EXERCISE AND HAVE A LOT OF FUN:
Laugh your way through life.
There’s no
better or stronger protection from stress than proper nutrition,
adequate rest and living a balanced joyful life. Make sure that
everyone in the family eats a healthy balanced diet, exercises
regularly, and allows time for adequate rest. Remember, you’ve
never really had fun when you were stressed and you’ve never been
stressed while you were truly having fun.
Dr. Trivedi is
the fonder of MINDvantageTM,
a private Personal Advancement Center with emphasis on
individualized care and attention to the quality of services. Get
more information at
www.MINDvantage.com.
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