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Stories take us to magical places. They take us outside the realm
of our reality and immerse us in a world of possibilities. These
possibilities make storytelling an excellent tool for helping
children meet the challenges of everyday living. Many children
find it hard to discuss their problems. They may feel embarrassed,
guilty or shy. Stories offer them a safe place to explore and
identify their emotions. When children hear or read stories they
become part of another world. It is a world similar to the one in
which they live. There are parents, siblings, teachers, and
friends. There are also characters who are dealing with the same
situations they are. In this way, stories help children know they
are not alone in their problems. They also let them see someone
else handle the issue. Once exposed to how a storybook character
masters a difficult situation, children are often inspired to
tackle their own problems.
Storytelling Tips
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What’s the problem? Before
choosing a story to read or tell parents first need to pinpoint
the problem. This can be difficult if your child is hesitant to
share. Think back to the recent past. Has anything changed? Did
you move? Did your child change schools or classrooms? Have you
noticed that your child is not talking about or playing with the
same children as before? Is your child having a hard time grasping
a particular subject? Has your toddler developed a fear of the
dark? Any change in routine, fear or new challenge may cause
problems for your child.
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Look for the book. Once parents
identify the problem, they need to find a book that addresses it.
Look for stories that are age appropriate and will appeal to your
child. Your local librarian can help with this. Another resource
is Books to Grow With - A Guide to Using the Best Children’s
Fiction for Everyday Issues and Tough Challenges. This reference
book, written by Cheryl Coon, offers parents reading suggestions
on over one hundred topics. From toilet training to starting
school to death, there is a book written about it.
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Accentuate the positive. Make
sure that the story you choose has a positive message and positive
values. The story is your tool. It is what will help you give your
child the confidence to succeed. By seeing a character overcome a
tough situation, the child gets the message it is possible. That
he can do it too.
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Choose a good time and place.
Choosing when and where you share stories with your child can be
as important as the story itself. Children will not benefit fully
from the message if they are not focused. Pick a comfortable place
with no noise or distractions. Choose a time when your child is
more centered and less restless. If you have a young child, hold
him close or on your lap so that there will be a connection. Also,
if you are reading to more than one child, make sure everyone can
see the pictures and hear the story. In short, do what you can to
ensure that the message is heard.
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Let your enthusiasm show. If
you are enthusiastic and excited about the story, it will show.
Your child will pick up on your excitement. He will want to listen
more carefully and become more involved with the story. The more
involved he is in the story, the more likely the message will hit
home. You can engage your child in a number of ways. Use different
voices for different characters. Use movement or act out some of
the action. Try your hand at sound effects. The more entertaining
the storyteller, the more absorbed the listener becomes.
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Laugh it up. Like enthusiasm,
humor can increase your child’s interest in the story. Humor is
also a great tool for offsetting serious issues. Sometimes when
children identify with a character or relate to a situation, it
makes them sad. Their current problem moves to the forefront,
drowning out the story and its positive message. This is your cue
to ham it up. Exaggerate. Make funny noises and faces. Jump
around. Put some humor into your story time.
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Talk, talk, talk. If the
message in the story hits home, your child may become very
talkative. Encourage your child to talk at any time during or
after the story. In a way, stories help ease their burden and
allow children who were previously stoic to open up. If this
happens with your child, that is fantastic. The story did its job.
If your child doesn’t feel like talking, then perhaps a few gentle
questions from you might help.
Dr. Caron B. Goode is the founder of
the Academy for Coaching Parents International, a training and
certification program for parent coaches. In addition to duties
with the academy, Goode is the founding editor of the website
InspiredParenting.net, and the author of eleven books, the most
recent of which is Help Kids Cope with Stress & Trauma, which
includes several chapters on he use of storytelling strategies.
For more information on The Academy for Coaching Parents
International or to sign up for academy announcements, visit
www.acpi.biz .
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